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Understanding Why Athletes Quit Playing
As another softball season heads into the final stretch run, many softball players are making the tough decision whether to stay with their current team or make a switch. For some, though, the decision is a little different: they are deciding whether to play at all anymore.
There are lots of reasons players stop playing. But in survey after survey, you’ll find one common reason overriding all the rest: it’s just not fun anymore.
When kids are small, they sign up for sports because they look like fun. Sometimes they find it’s not as much fun from the inside (for example, kids who don’t like to run usually don’t stick with soccer or basketball) so they move on to something else.
Once they find something they like, though, they tend to stick with it. At least for a while.
For some, the fun just keeps growing. They like the act of playing, they like the competition, they like the atmosphere.
But for others, it can become overwhelming. And that’s when they start to consider whether playing ball is something they want to continue doing.
This lack of fun can take a number of forms. Some call it burnout.
They’ve been doing the same thing over and over, constantly working on their games to get better. While that can be a driver for some, for others they just grow tired of it and decide they need to move on to something else.
For others it’s outside pressures, especially as they get better and begin to play at higher levels. These higher levels come with higher expectations, from coaches, from parents/guardians, from fans, from recruiters and others.
There is more pressure to win, and losses become more traumatic, especially if they’re playing for coaches with a “win at all costs” mindset.
Some thrive on the pressure, but others find themselves overwhelmed by it. They lose their sense of self and the reasons they started to play, and all they can think about is how bad it will be for them if they fail.
Eventually they succumb to those negative thoughts and just feel like they need to get out from under it so they stop playing before everyone thinks badly of them (in their minds).
In some cases the responsibilities of playing make them feel like they have no time for anything else. Yes, playing at a high level often requires sacrifice, such as missing a trip to the amusement park or a concert or a bestie’s birthday party because they have yet another tournament that weekend.
If there’s nothing they’d rather be doing they don’t mind missing those events. But if they start feeling like softball is starting to keep them from living the rest of their lives, they may decide to play at a lower, less-demanding level or not play at all.
So when does this feeling begin to occur? Typically it’s around the age of 13.
The game starts getting harder and their lives start getting more complicated. Instead of just playing for the love of the sport, they start feeling like they have to perform in a certain way in order to attract the attention of colleges so they can secure a scholarship to their college of choice.
If they don’t, even temporarily they can feel like they’re not enough or like they’ve let the people they love down. Rather than risking it, they decide to eliminate the problem by dropping out of the sport entirely.
So how do we keep that from happening and keep more players in the sport they love?
One is to understand that they’re not perfect. Your favorite player is going to go through tough times.
They’re going to strike out a little too often, or walk a few too many hitters, or make a few too many errors, or have some other issue. Instead of coming down on them about it, recognize that they didn’t fail on purpose.
Then give them the support they need. Encourage them, and help them through the tough times.
Remind them that it’s not the end of the world, and one bad game or even a series of bad games doesn’t have to define them.
Maybe they need a little extra practice time, and if you can help them with it do so. But maybe they need a break, something to take their minds off a bad game or series, so take them out to dinner or to a movie or to their favorite beverage retailer and talk about anything but softball.
In other words, help them clear their heads of the bad juju that’s going on in there and let go of whatever is dragging them down.
If they feel like the level they’re playing at is too much, talk to them and maybe suggest they drop a level to see if they can find their love of the sport again rather than abandon it entirely. Just like learning a new skill, sometimes you have to take a step backwards before you can take a step forward. They may find themselves reinvigorated and may even want to start pursuing it a higher level again once the pressure has been relieved.
You know your child best, so think it through and help her find the fun and the love she once had so she can get it back again.
Now, understand there can be other reasons a player may not want to play anymore. She may still love the game but her life priorities have changed. That’s not what we’re talking about here.
I’m thinking more about the player who has had the love of the game sucked out of her; she probably still wants to play but can’t quite get back into the right headspace.
The fun doesn’t have to be gone forever. Recognize the warning signs and help your player get back on track, and maybe everyone involved can enjoy this great sport a little longer.
When Scheduling, Leave Time for Practice
The other night as I was wrapping up from lessons I got into a conversation with my friend Dave Doerhoefer. In addition to being a private instructor, Dave is a long-time fastpitch softball coach with the Vernon Hills Stingers travel organization as well as Vernon Hills High School.
The question Dave asked was my feelings about the obsession many travel teams today seem to have with squeezing as many games as they possibly can into the brief summer season. It is not uncommon for travel teams – even those that only play a couple of months in the summer due to spring high school softball – to set a goal of playing 100+ games.
I’ve blogged about this before (actually back in 2012), and it only seems to have gotten worse. So much for me being an influencer.
Both Dave and I agree that teams that focus on playing a crazy amount of games are doing their players a disservice on several levels.
No time for practice
Probably the biggest issue is that if you’re scheduling 2-3 nights of games per week, plus playing tournaments every weekend, you’ve left little time for practice.
That’s a problem because games aren’t where you get better. That’s where you measure where your skills are currently. Practice is where you get better.
In practice you can field 100 ground balls or catch 100 fly balls, which allows you to really hone your skills. Especially if the coach is smart enough to make those balls just slightly outside your current level of competence and continues to raise the difficulty level as your skills improve.
In a game, you’re lucky if you get 7-10 touches on a batted ball. Most players will get far fewer, or perhaps not any, especially if you have dominant pitchers with good strikeout numbers playing in five inning games due to time limits.
Younger players playing in timed games, who are the ones that generally need the most repetitions, may only see three innings of play. It’s tough to get better when nothing happens.
Add the need to teach all the various situations and permutations a player needs to know to make the good, instant decisions required to play at a high or even decent level and the problem of not getting enough practice time grows exponentially.
Reducing the number of games to allow for more touches/repetitions and instruction time in practice will do more to grow a player’s skills and softball IQ than just throwing them out on the field and leaving it to random chance.
Keeping the excitement
When you play games practically every day what should be a happy diversion from normal life quickly turns into a job. And how happy are people with their jobs?
Research shows that while 65% of workers surveyed are happy with their jobs, only 20% are actually passionate about them. Translating that into teams, if you have a team of 12 players it means only 8 will actually be happy with the team, and just 3 will be passionate about it, if playing softball starts to feel like a job.
You never want playing to feel routine. You always want your players to be excited and ready to give their all – at least if you want to win.
Cutting back on the volume of games will help keep those you do play more special. It will also give the parents a little more time to keep those uniforms looking spiffy.
Reducing burnout
Burnout is a huge problem in today’s youth sports. In fact, research shows 40% to 50% of youth athletes report experiencing some level of burnout.
That doesn’t mean they stop playing necessarily. But they may not have the same level of enthusiasm for playing they once did, and that can lead them to dropping out of the sport entirely eventually.
We have to remember that while we may have big dreams and aspirations for these young athletes, they are still kids. A few may want to play all the time rather than pursuing other activities, but most need other stimuli to help them full enjoy their lives and reach their human (not just their softball) potential.
More general free time, or even more time spent in practices rather than game situations, can help them grow their social skills more effectively as well, which will also help prevent burnout.
Making time for multi-sport athletes
There is much talk about how college coaches love multi-sport athletes, and how being a multi-sport athlete is better for the youth athlete’s health. The cross-training of playing multiple sports can help prevent injuries, especially those caused by repetitive movements. It can also help prevent the burnout discussed above.
Yet it’s awfully tough to fit another sport into your schedule when your softball team is playing nearly every day as well as all weekend.
Of course, this isn’t just a fastpitch softball problem. EVERY sport seems to think they need their athletes playing an incredibly heavy schedule of games in order to compete, and they plan their years accordingly.
At some point nearly all athletes need to choose a sport to specialize in if they want to play at a higher level, i.e., college. But that doesn’t have to be prior to about 15 years old.
Younger teams that reduce their game schedules give their athletes the opportunity to pursue other sports, at least at some level, to help them fully develop their bodies and potentially reduce the chance of injury. In return, they get athletes who are better conditioned and mentally sharper, helping improve their performance on the softball field.
More is not always better
Yes, it’s easy to get caught up in the idea that more is better when it comes to scheduling games. But the reality is it’s not.
It’s time to bring some sanity back into the process. As you plan your 2024 game schedule, don’t get caught up in the “arms race” of which team in your area plays the most games.
Think strategically and prioritize quality of schedule (including the factors listed here) over raw quantity of games. I think you’ll find your results improve – and your athletes will have a better overall experience.
Scheduling photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com
New Research Notches Another Strike Against Early Sport Specialization
The debate over whether young athletes should play multiple sports or focus on one to develop their skills – often framed around the best way to earn a college scholarship – has been going on for quite a while now.
Up until a few years ago it wasn’t much of a debate. Nearly all kids played multiple sports, and each sport had a season. These days, with nearly all club/travel sports becoming year-round commitments, it gets tougher and tougher to be a multi-sport athlete.
Some new research published in the November issue of the Journal of the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons (JAAOS), a scientific, peer-reviewed publication, weighs in on the topic. Since reading the actual article would require you to purchase it, here’s a press release that provides a pretty good summary.
The article defines early sports specialization (ESS) as “the intensive training or competition in organized sport by prepubescent children (under the age of 12) for more than eight months per year, with a focus on a single sport to the exclusion of other sport and free play.” Does that sound like anyone you know?
The article goes on to point out that the “lack of diversified activity in youth leads to increased risk of injury and burnout.” No surprise there. Young bodies are still developing, and the constant repetition and wear-and-tear in the same ways can certainly take a toll.
As I like to explain, any sort of repetitive motion, done enough, can cause issues. Just look at carpal tunnel syndrome.
Clicking a mouse is hardly intense activity, yet 3-6% of adults in the U.S. acquire it at some point, often leading to surgery that costs thousands of dollars. Now imagine a much more robust series of activities repeated over and over on a body that hasn’t fully developed.
But what about the pursuit of excellence (and more specifically college scholarship opportunities)? The authors of the study state that ESS “may not be necessary for elite athletic achievement, but rather early diversification of sports leads to superior results.” They also say those who diversify show more enjoyment of sports in general, have a lower frequency of dropout, and have “fewer signs of chronic stress, higher levels of motivation and a gradual independence.”
I know I’ve seen the value of diversification in the athletes I’ve worked with over the years. For example, I love working with gymnasts, tumblers and cheerleaders. They have tremendous strength, especially in their core, as well as excellent body awareness that enables them to learn new athletic skills quickly. Skaters also tend to fall into this category.
Basketball, soccer, volleyball and lacrosse players are usually in great shape and very quick. No need to do a lot of conditioning or speed and agility work with them – someone else is already doing that heavy lifting for you. They tend to make excellent middle infielders and pitchers.
Those are just a few examples of how the skills and athleticism gained in other sports translate to fastpitch softball. Feel free to add more in the comments.
Of course, at some point athletes do have to start specializing to some degree if they’re going to pursue higher level play. By the time they reach high school age the time demands for club/travel players make maintaining a competitive level in one sport tough, much less two or three. Although it can still be done if the adults are adults about it and willing to accept that a multi-sport athlete may not make it to every practice and team activity.
By that age, players may also self-select out of multiple sports. They may recognize that they’re better at one than another and decided to focus on it, or may lose interest in some sports they liked in the past. Of course, a few will want to continue playing more than one, at which point they will likely have to choose which to do at a high level and which to do at more of a recreational level.
At the younger ages, however, participating in different sports should not only be allowed but encouraged. Parents and coaches should work together to build a schedule that’s best for the young athlete as well as the team – including total time off from everything now and then so the kid can be a kid.
Coaches can also take heart from the fact that many of the basic skills from other sports will transfer to softball, helping players become better than they would have been otherwise.
Now, if your child isn’t interested in other sports it doesn’t make sense to force him or her into them just for the sake of cross-training. But most kids aren’t that narrowly focused.
As a society we need to dial back our obsession with youth sports (and college scholarships for 10 year olds) and instead focus on helping our kids establish a solid foundation and love for athletics that will carry them through their lives. The evidence increasingly shows it’s best for them in both the short and long terms.
Life in the Fastpitch Lane 